I started thinking about the on screen time ratio between the factions. It feels like it’s 60/40 (60% autobots, 40% decepticons).
Starscream and Thundercracker are attacking a steel mill to get some metal or something. Two autobots are also at the same place, and interrupt them, and one says “That looks like ’steel’ing to me.” The Dcons run outside, blow up the two inside, take like 6 steel I beams each, transform and fly off. Seems like a wasted recon, what good is 12 I beams going to do? You can’t even build a house with that.
Optimus doesn’t know why they took them either. Spike knows how to work their computer and launches a probe to figure it out. Does this kid even have a job anymore? His Dad is there half the time too. How do they get food? I doubt Telatraan has beds for humans… For all we know, Spike was saving up for college, and along come the Autobots. Now what skills does he have that prospective employers would want? Talking to alien robots? Maybe the government, but nobody else would give a shit. And with an alien computer, I doubt he’s getting his typing speed up. He won’t even be able to be a secretary. This kid is fucked if they Autobots ever leave. Also, where’s Chip? He’s the character I remember the most, even more so than Spike. He was in what, two episodes?
Oh, now the Decepticons are at an incan temple, talking about legends. The crystal of power is within! I bet it has a bunch of energon capabilities or whatever. Starscream built a frame for the crystal as a laser weapon or something with the steel. Laserbeak found the probe, and they test the crystal powered cannon by fireing at the probe. The local humans think it’s the ancient gods, and one local young one knows about the crystal of power. Also, with that one shot, the cannon is busted because starscream is an idiot; the actual cannon part is melted. Starscream blames it on Thundercracker, and Megatron pushes TC down the temple.
Sideswipe and Wheeljack are at the north pole trying to dig up skyfire. They got him out! Awesome. That was easy. *staples button*
Skyfire takes two “midget” autobots, Braun and Windcharger to take on Megatron, Soundwave, and Reflector. They gravely miscalculated. Now Skyfire has to come and save them. Soundwave is wielding gun Megatron. Laserbeak is chasing Windcharger. Skyfire shows up, and they get away.
That was kind of pointless. They didn’t find anything out, and riled them up for nothing. Also, Skyfire has officially become their air bus. They’re all in the Incan place now. Why didn’t they drive there? Like they did to the north pole, haha.
Megatron and co find better metal to build a cannon out of. Autobots interupt, and Truck Optimus slams into Megatron, knocking him through a wall, totally sweet. Braun stole Megatron’s arm gun, and shoots it at Megatron into the gut. For some reason that young incan girl is at the new steel mill and Spike & Bumblebee save her. What was she doing there!?
Starscream accidentally hits Skyfire, because he was aiming at Thundercracker. TC called Starscream a geek too :p
Megatron hits a mountain, which causes boulders to fall towards the village and at people. The autobots use their lasers to destroy the rocks. They get cheers from the villagers. There was a commercial break in there, so it was ultra dramatic.
Now their new laser cannon is built, and it works. Skyfire is locked in the temple, and BB and Spike find him. Soundwave unleashed Ravage earlier and it attacks Bumblebee.
Megatron is having fun with his new toy, and shoots at some Autobots. Laserbeak is sitting on his shoulder. He’s a pirate. Laserbeak wanna cracker?
Big laser battle, everybody’s shooting at everybody else.
Spike fixes Skyfire, and at the last second Skyfire grabs Ravage, throws him, and Ravage runs away.
Autobots make it up the temple, and stop Megatron from firing. Optimus sneaks up on Megatron, picks him up, and throws him down the temple. They retreat immediately. Thundercracker calls both Megatron and Starscream Geeky. But man, they got out of there pretty quick.
There’s a new problem. When Megatron pulled the crystal out, a big gushing energy beam started going towards the sky, which was also partially powering the laser because it was sitting on top of it. Wheeljack “invents” a cap that will go over the energy wave, trapping it back inside the temple. They serously called it an invention, but it’s nothing more than an upside down curved manhole, like a cereal bowl made of metal. It made some lights, which I guess “locked” it in place.
The incan girl wants to thank Bumblebee by introducing him to her brother’s convertable (incans have convertables?) that they call “Juanita” (phonetially Wha-knee-tah).
So, the Fire on the Mountain was that crystal thing. Next up, War of the Dionbots. Dionbots? Somebody named that file wrong. I’m sure it’s Dinobots. Yay! More Dinobots! Wait… Maybe they mispelling was the other way? Deon? Celine Deon? She’d be a decepticon, probably one of Soundwave’s tape bots with a french accent. Her laser would play music that kills boners.
Well, that’s a good note to go out on, a laser that kills boners.